You just have to tune in.
I watched a show about a stalker last night.
Karen, a single mother, living in New York, kept bumping into a neighbor living on a street she frequently walked through.
At first, he just seemed lonely and kept asking her to go for a coffee; Karen politely declined many times, but he persisted. Every time she saw him, he’d ask again, “Please, come for a coffee.”
This routine became a daily occurrence. Eventually, this man wore her down, and Karen agreed. When he turned around and said, my apartment is just here, it was such an uncomfortable moment – she thought he meant in a cafe, but now felt committed and too polite to say no. Karen followed him to his 2nd-floor apartment, and they had a coffee.
He was earning money to send back home to support his family in the Philippines – it made her feel at ease that he was married with kids. He showed her photos and expressed his loneliness at not having many friends or family close-by.
Karen recognizes in retrospect that this was her first mistake; after that first fateful coffee, he became more and more obsessed with her; he started standing outside DAILY, to wait for her to walk past. Then started standing outside her house at all hours of day and night.
One day he wore her resolve down again, and Karen agreed to one more coffee. (Thinking – this whole saga would be over if she agreed).
Instead, Karen almost lost her life when he suddenly turned violent and nearly stabbed her to her death. She managed to escape by claiming she would ‘stay with him’ – he ceased his attack just long enough for her to make an escape. Karen crawled out of the apartment, down the flight of stairs, onto the street, and screamed for help.
Karen’s gut told her, ‘no’ to being around this person; her intuition was urging her ‘this wasn’t right.’ But she wanted to appear kind and cordial.
I can so relate to this story. The pull to be compliant and friendly is so strong and can seem louder than your intuitive voice.
I remember my intuition telling me to prolong an embryo’s storage and transfer it later when I had recovered more. Instead, I listened to my fertility specialist, who said so enthusiastically – why wait! Let’s transfer it now! The transfer failed. My liver became inexplicably dysfunctional, and cholesterol was dangerously high from all the IVF drugs. My GP wanted to put me on statins. She was scared I’d have a heart attack. In retrospect, my body was compromised and not functioning correctly. Concerning carrying a baby at that time, no wonder it didn’t stick.
I feel out of touch with my intuition when I am too busy, stressed, having health issues, or being rushed or pressured into decisions.
I’m living in the dark when I lose my connection to my intuition.
These days, I make a special effort to exercise faith in this beautiful gift.
When I listen to intuition, it feels scary and may appear non-sensical to others. But it seems like intuition knows my deepest mysteries.
Listening to my intuition serves me well. I see her as my guardian angel.
Another example; Just last week, a strange man tried to talk to me across many rows of open seating at a bus station. And even before I sat down, I felt this man’s eery presence in the vicinity and his eyes following me.
This time I listened to my inner creep-radar and left the building quickly. I listened to my intuition on this person’s vibe. I called my husband and asked if he could please help and walk me to my car as I didn’t feel safe.
In the past (before I learned about how much husbands want to protect their wives): I would have tried to handle it, ignore it (because that helps, right?!), or avoid burdening people with a request for help. Now I feel so grateful for the awareness that it’s no trouble at all.
Fear can over-ride intuition leading to awful decisions too. It comes in the form of questions in my mind that start with “I should do,” “I must…right away…” etc.
I feel most in touch with my intuition when I take excellent care of myself, creating alone time to process my thoughts. Talking my feelings over with close friends also helps. I have several questions and principles I go through, which I share with my clients to connect to their needs, feelings, and intuition.
People around you may have many agendas and intentions, but nobody knows YOU, better than you.
Some quick tips to tune into Intuition:
- If you feel pressured into something, be really careful. Remove yourself from the situation for a while if you can. Take all the time you need to make your own decisions
- Prioritise your health so you can focus on the life unfolding around you
- Slow down everything, from your schedule, breathing to your physical movements as you go about your day
- Maintain balance, ask for help, keep enough space in your life for contemplation and reflection
- Build trust within yourself
- Embrace solitude – isolate from external noise and spend time in nature or in a quiet space. Plug into yourself without any external distraction for more clarity
- Learn how to set boundaries and how to stick to them
- Shift your perspective – explore other explanations for people’s actions or behaviour. Could the opposite of what you think be true? e.g. they’re not lonely, they’re predatory
- Read between the lines – see if you can identify the hidden motives and desires underneath people’s comments or stories
- Do not outsource your decision-making, trust your inner direction
- Turn down the volume of other people’s opinions, commentary and advice (it’s likely only applicable to them and their lives)
- Pay attention to your dreams – analyse any symbols, google the dream content, get curious about the messages in your subconscious
- Find a friend / mentor who can un-pack your feelings with you when confused
It’s taken me a while to trust and develop my intuition but anyone can start practicing these techniques, try it today!
© Morvana Zaahira Goodman 2021